Actually not that many. Just two.
One of them is Dick Chan. The other one? Read on.
I was surfing through friendster today, to link my friends to my blog. Guess what I found?
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"Who wrote this, and what is all this about? In such horrible English somemore!" you ask.
He is the ex of mine whom I was with for 2 years and 9 months. Make that the moronic ex of mine whom I was with for a fucking 2 years and 9 months.
My face BURNED with anger the moment I processed the information presented to me.
In my mind, the phrase What The Fuck! exploded and I got really pissed off and couldn't concentrate on my work until I can get this off my chest. Which I am doing so right now.
The only ones who know what really happened between us are Shirley jie, Jean, Dar and myself, who knows best.
The following is addressed to said ex. I really feel like posting his full name and moronic face here but I shall not because I am a nice girl whom everyone loves.
I really need to get my thoughts together. Right now I am burning with rage inside. I really feel like blogging everything out but some things are better kept confidential. And yes, you know what I'm talking about.
I had already expected you to hate me for a relationship that failed, but not in this way.
I expect a 23-year-old guy to be mature enough to understand that when a relationship doesn't work out, it is supposed to end. Didn't your almighty God teach you this?
I tried countless of times to salvage our relationship that was slowly tearing apart, but what I got in return was being pushed away.
You showed me that you didn't love me anymore.
You showed me that I didn't know how to love you anymore.
You showed me that you no longer appreciated me for who I am.
You showed me that you didn't care a shit whether this relationship will work out or not.
You showed me that you're really not worth all that effort to save everything.
You showed me that you just want me out of your life, because I took a life away from you.
And that's exactly what I did.
Get.Out.Of.Your.Life.
I was leading a pretty peaceful life ever since we broke up in late August and I was getting over you.. Finally. I got happily attached to Eric in mid-Jan. And then you had to try to come back to my life again soon after my new life with Eric began.
I rejected you.
You know why?
He showed me what I was missing out on in a healthy and satisfying relationship.
He showed me how I deserve to be treated when someone says he loves me.
He showed me how a person loves another, and he taught me to love again.
He showed me what it felt like to be sincerely loved and cherished.
He showed me what a mistake it was for me to have stuck with you for so long, in exchange for a whole lot of sadness and pain.
He healed my heart, the very same heart that you so effortlessly got, used, and then threw away only to realise that you want it back when it's already too late.
He gives me something to look forward to when I wake up every morning.
That's right.
Future.
A future that belongs to two people who sincerely love each other and who are willing to walk with each other no matter what the future may bring.
A future that belongs to two people who sincerely accept each other for who and what they are, not for who and what they are not.
A future that belongs to two people who only see today and tomorrow, never yesterday.
I am so disappointed with your behaviour. I expected you to be a more gracious person, a real man who can take everything in your stride.
You know what, Jack, it is simply U N F A I R to label me a slut because I am most certainly not one. Firstly, I do not sleep around. Secondly, I ain't no prostitute. These are facts which you KNOW. By labelling me a slut, you are defaming me. You know, slander?
I did not call you a jerk even though we split.
I did not call you a bastard for treating me this way.
I did not call you a fucker for what you did to me.
All I wanted was for us to split amicably, even if we may not be friends anymore, because we are grown adults.
God showed you that I am not worth your love?
God proved to you that I am nothing but a slut?
Why didn't God show you how to love?
Why didn't God prove to you that I had loved you with all my heart?
You know, I'm starting to think that you are with the wrong church. I don't mean to discriminate against your church, just feel that you haven't changed for the better at all. You're still so narrow-minded, still an MCP, still so obsolete in your own world.
You know what, Jack, I got my life back as well. Not just you.
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